August 14, 2011

Bambino!



OK, I can FINALLY update this blog without getting yelled at!

Since I've known for the last 3 weeks that I was pregnant, it has been so hard to talk to people! Taylor and I decided to keep the news to ourselves and our close family until we had our first doctor's appointment and things were further along. Wise? Yes. Responsible? Yes. Easy? HECK NO! We have both been dying to tell the world that there's a little Smithlet growing in my belly, but kept mum as best we could.

Hence the lack of updates on the blog. I thought about posting 100 times, but the only thing that felt newsworthy was the one thing I wasn't allowed to tell. But now I can. So tell I will.

I actually realized that I was 'late' because of work. The three girls I work with, and myself, had all synched our cycles pretty fast and when I realized that I had missed my turn on the P-train, I got a little nervous. (Let me preface this with the fact that Taylor and I want nothing more in this world than to be parents, but we are also aware of the fact that our life situation right now is not the best to bring a baby into; but we'll discuss that more later). So I stopped at Publix on the way home from work and bought a pregnancy test (First Response, to be exact, because they claim to detect the slightest amount of pregnancy hormone). I had even debated not telling Taylor that I was going to take the test until I knew the results, but he knew something was up as soon as I got home. It was pretty late by the time I arrived and I had to get up early the next morning, so I decided that no matter how anxious I was, I was going to wait until tomorrow to take the test so I could get a good night's rest. Yeah... that didn't happen. At about 3:45am I had to pee and what better time to take a pregnancy test than when you already have to pee, right? So, me and that funny little stick took a trip to the bathroom and to my absolute shock there were not one, but TWO pink lines! I very calmly (and in a bit of a daze) walked back into our bedroom and turned on the light. Taylor shot up out of bed trying to decide if he had to shoot someone or run from a fire, when I showed him the funny little stick with the TWO pink lines on it. He replies "Sooo.. what does that mean?" After we both realized what was happening I finally said, "Ya know, that second line is pretty faint. I bet it's a fluke. I'll take another test in the morning to be sure." And, sure enough, the rest is history...

I can't tell you how excited I am to be preparing to be a mother. If you know me AT ALL, you know that this is what I have spent my whole life preparing for. Some people are called to this earth to be musicians... or businessmen... or world leaders... I can honestly tell you that I have been called to this earth to raise up a generation of gods and goddesses to serve my Lord in these perilous latter days. I have done everything I can to do that up to this point: being active with the youth in the church, doing my best to be a good example, and being the best darn EFY counselor I knew how to be. But I have been limited, up to this point, in my ability to truly shape and uplift this next generation. Here is where my real task begins. Building a home conducive to raising up a family of righteous, loving, selfless disciples who will be eager and prepared to do the Lord's work.

How blessed I am to be joining the ranks of the most amazing women across the world who are responsible for the raising of the gods. I am honored, nervous, excited, and scared. But, in all things, knowing that my Father in Heaven is mindful of me, of my family, and of this little angel rapidly developing in my body.

On a less "preachy" note, I go to the doctor tomorrow to go over the results of my ultrasound. Little peanut is about 1/2 inch long with a heart rate of 161.. and literally looks like a peanut. Mama has been feeling super gross so far, but some of the nausea is subsiding (at least, for now). We will definitely keep you all updated as things develop and we are so grateful for all the outpouring of well wishes from our family and friends. You are all amazing!